This post will be dedicated to a close friend of mine who,just a few days ago,broke down crying in our Values class when she remembered a dream she had the previous night.
The reason she remembered the dream was because what was happening in real life was almost exactly like her dream,thank the universe it wasn't. In her dream our teacher asked us to write on pieces of paper a word that we thought described the owner of the paper. By the end of the activity,after the papers were passed in a full cycle,we had our own papers with other people's opinions on us. In real life we did this activity a few years ago. In the dream she looked at the paper and out of all the words written she could only clearly see four words : Slut,Whore,Stupid and Useless. All she could remember after that was waking up in tears and sending a text to her boyfriend about it.
In class we asked her what was wrong. She told us about the dream and we explained to her that it was a dream,nothing more. She then followed by saying what if. What if that was what we thought about her,what if everyone thought that about her. Although we didn't think she was any of those words,we understood why she was bothered.
Now if there's one thing I'm good at,its ignoring other people and their opinions. Its how I get through a day without any arguments.
But other people aren't like me,but they can try.
The whole reason we dress well and do good outside is because we want to impress someone. Whether it be a lover,a family member,your boss or even yourself,we always try to impress someone. To feel better about yourself,focus on impressing yourself. Its true that everyone will judge you,but their judgement wont be relevant unless you let it be relevant.
Take a look at everyone in the room you are in,or try to remember your first impression of people. You judged them based on what you saw or what you knew about them,and they probably did the same to you. But if your judgement doesn't affect them,why should their's affect you?
As a kid we never thought about these type of things,but as we grow up,its all we ever think about.
Cretinism can be good and constructive,but some people are more sensitive than others. But if you are too focused on other people opinions about you,then you're just tearing yourself down. Most of these judgments that you think people have about you probably aren't even real. Just like my friend. She thought other people saw her as a useless slut,but the truth was,we saw her as a beautiful and friendly person.
We are our own demons. If we can put a smile on our face and push aside the bad things we see in ourselves,then other will,too.
Best of luck.